The future and the past all feel like a dreary haze, a liquid entity that would merely slip through her fingers. The only solidity is in the present: the longing, the torment, the unendurable present that consumes her.
Occasionally the instances that brought her here flash in her mind, an insignificant check-up with the doctor… that check-up which had stirred so much within. She had thought the prescription would be of little consequence, yet the constant arousal within her after taking it seemed to be too out of the ordinary to ignore. When she had brought it up with the doctor at subsequent visits, he simply gave her a short examination, one which involved him touching her more than she had a feeling was necessary; it was as if he could see her thoughts and had delved into those locked away fantasies. After the examination, he’d given her a stronger dose to take. Unsurprisingly, it made her even hornier. The more she masturbated, the more the desire seemed to consume her. Day and night, sexual thoughts clouded her mind while the desire to touch lingered without respite. She couldn’t take it; she had to return. She did not even question it when she was made to change into a gown, as if she were to be staying for a long duration, nor did she question him requesting that she changed there in his office. The idea turned her on even more. All she wanted was for the sensations to die down, yet the thought of his eyes lingering on her made her melt inside. She tried to pretend that it was the prescription that had made her lust after this man even more.
“Do you feel a heat within your body? Does this turn you on?” his words seemed to still echo; that visit was filled with so much touching, yet she wanted more and more. It was beyond an examination. It became a full exploration of her body, yet not once did she protest. It was something she had dreamed about, something that she’d expected would never be fulfilled in her lifetime, yet here it was, a dream launched into reality.
She remembers being touched until it was unbearable, until the need to orgasm right there in his office made her whimper the one word, “Please!” It made him stop and look at her as if she were a new prized possession, one he had wanted to add to a personal collection for years – a look of victory and fascination. She was too aroused to even object to the restraints he fitted her with, cuffing her to the examination table. All that ran through her mind were thoughts of sexual relief, of fulfilment. Those thoughts still trickle amidst the inferno of desire.
All day she is teased and tormented, brought so close to orgasm that the need nearly hurts. Her body is like the doctor’s own personal experiment, bringing her to the brink in new ways every time, yet the now overly familiar horror of being left on the edge, in a state of delirious longing, never changes. The medication continues its effect, never letting the feelings dull within her, no matter how many times she screams out and thrusts her hips or arches her back. He keeps her in the restraints all the time, knowing she’d masturbate herself endlessly to orgasm after orgasm the second her hands were free. While being explored by those cruel fingers, she is an addict to the pleasures her flesh has succumbed to, craving for more, just to tip her over. When left alone to fight the urges, she is a writhing mass of desperation and need.
Cruelly he teases her for so long, treating her like a typical patient, telling her in a painfully relaxed manner exactly where he is touching and what reactions they are getting out of her.
“Upon sliding back the clitoral hood, it can be seen that after an hour of being left without any stimulation, the clitoris continues to twitch of its own accord. I see it makes your back arch and hips rock just by touching it directly for a second. I will trap it between my fingertips and roll it between them for 20 minutes now, stopping at the point of climax and then continuing; your pussy juices are flowing down your thighs once again just at the mention of this. Perhaps the drug is having more of an effect than I had anticipated.” Just thinking about the things he had said makes her clench her teeth in agonised lust.
The worst part is when the doctor’s female assistant comes in to bathe and feed her, never touching her more than she needs to and never responding to the pleading that always greets her. Only when the doctor returns does the physical stimulation return again, the steady descent into a living hell of arousal.
He leaves the keys in sight all the time, just to tease her even when he is not there. Yet sometimes she wonders whether, if she had them, she would truly try to escape. One thing she is sure of, though, is that once he does let her leave, her mind will never escape from the fantasies instilled in her. She will never be free of the all-consuming desires that she has been locked in here with.